Skeleton envy

Skeletons - see how thin their legs are? Who could imagine that beneath my chunky thighs lurked those stick-like bones? And the pelvis - are my hips really like that, underneath? Ah, you skinny people that I see around me every day - one day I, too, will be as thin as you. Dead, granted. But oh, how satisfyingly bony.

I fear I'll never join a gym. Too old. Too fat. Too busy. Too shy.

Sigh.