Logic

Extract from a boy's essay in defence of video games:

One good point about video games for today’s generation, who spend more time inside than their parents did when they were young, is that when they do get out, their senses are more refined than other people’s, which could be an advantage.

Ye-e-e-s.

I've just been out with some friends. One was commiserating with me about the ankle. "I had a festive injury too," she said.

She'd been out at a work Christmas event and had become slightly merry. She'd also won a prize: a HUGE bar of Toblerone. She really likes Toblerone so this made her even merrier.

"You know how it is when you've had some wine," she went on. "You can only think about one thing at a time. So when I got a taxi home, I kept thinking, Don't leave the chocolate in the taxi. You can have some when you get home and it'll counteract the wine."

So she clutched it to her bosom all the way home in the taxi, got to her front door safely, opened it and was met by her enthusiastic dog. "I was pleased to see him too," she said, "so I rushed to give him a hug and dropped the enormous bar on my foot. I couldn't walk for days and it's still bruised."

"So you threw the Toblerone away in disgust?" I asked.

"I was so angry with it," she said, "that I ate it."