Saturday, June 04, 2011
Marriage, and birth, and death, and thoughts of these
Thank you for all your kind comments about the death of my aunt. It’s not as painful as losing a parent, especially since she had moderate dementia and for the last couple of weeks of her life was very ill. But because I’d had so much to do with her care over the past eighteen months, and because I was genuinely fond of her, her death gave me more of a jolt than I perhaps expected.
The time has flown by since then and yet paradoxically it seems surprising to think that she was alive only ten days ago. Her funeral on Thursday was lovely: a true celebration of her life and that of her late husband.
And I’m aware of that strange mixture of feelings that one has at such times. There’s relief that she’s been freed from that failing body and mind – she was such an energetic, practical and busy person, a doctor working for very little money in Pakistan and Afghanistan from 1951 to 1983. There’s sorrow for her and for all of us, that we must in time grow frail and die. There’s fear at what ten years can do: change us from that strong, busy person to a confused little bird in a bed with padded sides.
It’s beloved Daughter 2’s birthday today. She’s 30. Where does the time go? (As above.) She came up from London for the funeral and then her birthday weekend with her chap and her best friend - one of her bridesmaids. She had a wedding dress fitting today. And today Daughter 2 and her husband (about five weeks to go till the baby!) and Son and his lady are here. Lots of fun, food, bed-changing, washing up.
I will get back to reading and commenting on other people’s blogs in a few days. 89 papers to go, to be finished by Wednesday. Meanwhile, don’t do anything too exciting without me, will you?