Wednesday, August 31, 2011


When our son first left home about three years ago, I found it very difficult to do the supermarket shopping. It was especially hard to walk past the packaged mango and pineapple pieces because I always used to buy them for him to eat as snacks.

Now I'm ok with this. Kind of.

Missing Daughter 2, I now have trouble driving through the district of Leith - which I've had to do on several occasions in the past few weeks - because she used to work there and her flat, now rented out, is there.

And then, the other night, I was lying in bed listening to the radio when this came on:

It's a choir singing Eric Whitacre's "Sleep", which her Edinburgh choir used to sing so beautifully.

I couldn't listen to it that night. I can't listen to it now.

I suppose it'll get better eventually.


  1. It does get better.....several years ago our younger son left for a 12-month working holiday in Canada, and hasn't come back yet. Had I known that was going to happen I don't think I could have let him go. But we love his girlfriend, and they are happy together.

  2. I think your missing them so much is because you love them so much and that is an amazing gift for all of you.

    Although I love my parents very much and know they love me, I have never lived with them as an adult (or a child really as I went to boarding school at 10!) so we don't have that element of closeness. I don't really miss them and vice versa because I've never HAD them in that way. And I find that a bit sad, especially as they get older.

    I hope it gets easier soon though.

    Lesley x

  3. It will get better... just keep in touch as much as you can by phone and email.


  4. It will get better but dang it ... why can't they just move back home??? Why do they have to go out on their own??? Missing my boys so much makes me realize how my mother feels, even though we live in the same city. I know she'd like nothing more than for me to move in with her. Seeing her in the mornings and evenings would probably even make the fact that I work more tolerable to her.

    Maybe all those people who live in big communes have the right idea??? How would a big family commune be?

    Anyway, I know it doesn't help much, but you're in good company. I hope it will get better quickly for you.

  5. Oh I know how you feel, quite bereft, but it does get better...Thank you for the link to the beautiful choir, it is the first time I have heard this and it reduced me to tears x

  6. I find your longing quite touching. I know my mother missed me terribly when I went to Europe, but by the time I left home permanently after returning, it was well past time to move on.

  7. we were sitting around at work (not working) one day and one of the younger women mentioned that she loved her daughter so very much that she just couldn't imagine the little girl growing up and moving on ... the Southern Belle in the group said, "And THAT, darlin', is why the Good Lord gives us the teen years!"

    well ... that concept held true for my older three, but i don't EVER want my baby to leave...

    p.s. - the younger woman's daughter ended up being hell on wheels and her mother gave her moving boxes for high school graduation ... i'm just sayin'

  8. I feel you pain Isabelle....and yet the bond that you have with your children will ensure you are always in each others lives...whatever the miles in between are.

  9. I have a number of years to go before this kind of thing becomes reality for me, but still - I can imagine how painful this must be for you. I just want to leave you warm thoughts and a very big hug!